Kindness is something that I have truly learnt the value of later in life.

In your 20’s I think most people are essentially selfish (quite rightly) and focused on career, love, fun, everything you should be focused on. In your 30’s I think you still have your eye on your career and fun with maybe a leaning towards settling down, buying a house and possibly having children. (Obviously these are generalisations, but I think they probably fit the majority of people.) By your 40’s I think you are more reflective. If you are parents, you’re working out your own style verses how you were brought up and if you’re not parents, you’re probably still having a lot of fun, with way more money in your pocket!

Either way, I think most people start to realise who they really are and what’s important in life by the time they reach their forties. (If they haven’t realised it by now there probably isn’t much hope!)

If you get to your 40’s without anything negative happening to you, you’ve done well. But even if you are in this fortunate position, you start to realise that ‘shit happens’ and lots of people go through difficult times caused by things like illness, grief, divorce, redundancy and debt to name just a few. I have learnt that the best way to help anyone who is struggling is to offer them kindness, not judgement.

I have to say I’ve had a pretty cushy run up to this point in my life (and I have always sat in gratitude for that) but as I face a difficult time I have been truly overwhelmed with how kind people have been to me and my family.

I have had everything from lovely messages, flowers, cards and gifts to visits and offers of help. Different friends have offered their various brilliant skills from physio and reiki to knowledge in bio medicine and cooking. Just this week alone (whilst Dave is away on business) the boys and I have been invited out to tea three times which has been amazing. Those who are too far away to physically do anything to help have been keeping in touch, checking in on me and sending me positive vibes.

I can’t thank my friends and family enough for all the support they have shown so far. As one of my good friends said to me today, ‘it will be a long road, hard at times, but it will never be a lonely one’ and I can’t tell you how important that is to me. I am a social animal and I love people.

I feel very loved and very grateful. I also feel like I am going into battle, not on my own, but with an army of supporters behind me and I know that will make a massive difference to my personal fight.

So, whilst this is only the beginning, I do want to say thank you to everyone who has supported me, Dave and the boys so far. Your kindness has been life-affirming.

As Oscar Wilde said ‘The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the greatest intention’